Who misses bullets?
-Shawn and I bought a tree skirt at WalMart the other day. Ask me if we have a tree to even put it around? Because we sure don't. We bought some Christmas wrapping paper too - because, why not? Christmas is in 42 days and the only Christmas supplies we own are a tree skirt and wrapping paper. I think my husband secretly wants to splurge on one of those horrifying Santa/snowman/penguin blow up spectacles people put on their roof. But I sort of secretly judge people that put anything but lights on their roof. Just saying.
-After deciding not to pimp our dog out to the ladies, we finally made the appointment to hack of Toby's manhood. Pleasant, right? A part of me is a little nervous he'll hate me for life afterwards. The other part secretly wishes that Toby could understand me when I tell him that karma's a huge bitch. (I love my dog, but sometimes I want to sell him to the circus.)
-Remember when I posted about Shawn's birthday - and how I was such a superior individual for thinking about it so soon in advance? Well, his birthday is next Friday - and other than giving him an all-day free ride pass for certain naked activities, I've got nothing.
-Turns out single-handedly eating an entire Costco size bag of pretzel M&Ms turns your poop green. For three days. (Your welcome.)
-Speaking of Shawn's birthday - Harry Potter comes out the same day. So naturally we are going to the midnight showing. Oh wait. We couldn't get tickets to the midnight. So we're going at three o'bloody clock in the morning. If it were any other day, this would so not be kosher. My thoughts are, what's the point of seeing it at 3 in the morning, people have already seen it before you - it isn't cool anymore. You may as well go the next morning. But then again, I'm really not a die-hard Harry Potter fan. I'd be lying if I said I've read the books. Yeah. I said it. My 5th grade teacher read us the first one, and for whatever ridiculous reason, whenever a teacher reads a book to a class, I pretty much hate it. So needless to say, I haven't tried since then. Oh wait, I did, and couldn't get past the first 20 pages. I've horrified plenty of people with this. I promise I'm still a cool person though.
-Shawn held a baby for the first time in, oh, ten years. It was adorable. And thus my ovaries raged.
Okay, so this is a short one - because I have to go.
Maybe it's better that way.
Happy Weekend, Internet.