Wednesday, December 1, 2010

My Own Personal Virtual Victory Dance

I've never been more royally steamed at my husband than I was a couple weeks ago.
And of all things, it was over football.  Football.

Anyone who knows me knows how apathetic I am when it comes to most sports.  I'm the girl that cheers when everyone else cheers, even though I have no idea why I'm cheering.  The girl who is constantly asking people to decode ref sign language when they start flailing their arms around.  The girl who spends more time judging the cheerleaders, than watching the game.  The girl who screams "Touchdown!" during a baseball game, just to turn heads.  The girl who lofts a basketball from half court rather than passing it to someone that can actually get it through the hoop.  The girl who would be the last player on a team in dodgeball every time by not doing a damn thing.  Do we get the gist, Internet?  I wasn't exactly blessed with profound knowledge or skill of sports. 

The only two recent exceptions are Jazz games and University of Utah football games.
Especially when the University of Utah is playing BYU.

 I've mentioned the colossal rivalry that exists between the University of Utah and BYU before.
I've probably also mentioned that I was born and raised a Utah fan, while my husband is a die-hard, BYU fanatic.

(High five for anyone who can guess where this is going.)

Now, you should know that I have no problem rooting for BYU, when they aren't playing the U.   This somehow tricks my husband into thinking that I'm not a "real" Utah fan - and that I'll become a part of BYU's fan base in no time.  Our marriage has, in fact, done just the opposite.  I've never been a more hard core Utah fan than I am since I married Shawn.  If we ever get into a legitimate argument, it's usually because we're bitching about who's team is better, or has better fans.  Clearly we are super mature.  Needless to say, it's a touchy topic in our house - so I do my best to avoid it. 

However, avoiding it isn't always easy.  Especially when I come home to find my husband has painted over the U on our curb.  Or when my husband tries to convince me that there's a difference between being a student at the U, and being a fan.  Or when he tries to purchase a BYU stocking for Christmas.  Or when I come home to a butt-ton of BYU coasters on our coffee table.   (Which Toby ripped to pieces. *Cough*)

However, none of that is as bad as what I came home to a few weeks ago.  I've never been more furious with my husband than I was when I came home and found him putting a big ass, lit up, blazing Y on our roof.  The only worse thing he could have done was burn a Y into our grass and dump buckets of blue paint on our house.  (I realize it's petty, but you have to know how competitive and stubborn I can get to understand why I was so peeved.)

 Crappy picture.  But eh.

Had I done the same thing with a U, I feel he probably would have set fire to our roof.  That's mostly why I was mad.  I let him keep it up there, but fully warning him there would be payback.  I planned on putting an even bigger U on the other side of our house - but snow kind of ruined that plan.  (Just like snow ruins virtually everything else.) 

Game day finally came - when I had the best epiphany ever.

Please observe.

Needless to say, Shawn and I didn't watch that game together.
Which is probably a good thing.

Because guess who won?
That would be me The Utes.

It should be noted that BYU did play a good game.
Just not good enough to win. 

I love you, husband.  :)


  1. BEAUTY!!!!! i love it totally, ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!!!!

  2. Go Utes!
    I love this. Hubby and I are both U fans and the last time we were in Provo, we got stuck in a traffic jam from a BYU game.....Oh man. We were cussing up BYU fans for miles. Thats the fourth time it has happened to us. Thankfully, I have never been stuck in a U traffic jam. WE ARE SUPERIOR!!!

  3. Hi! Alright so I just read through... a huge number of your posts. Found you and your blog is so funny, and amazingly honest. Love that you write about being a newlywed (since I'm one too!). Following you through 20sb (I think).


    I love college football rivalries. There isn't anything better in sports.

  5. Love this post! The hubs and I aren't so much into football, but we're both HUGE baseball fans. If we'd liked rival teams, I wouldn't have ever had a thing to do with him. Much respect for putting up with someone who doesn't have the better taste in sports, as you obviously do ;)

  6. Winning is the best thing ever. And rubbing it in? A close second.