Wednesday, October 19, 2011

Promotions, Modge Podge, & HotPants

So plenty of things have happened recently that would probably merit their own post.  But because that obviously didn't happen, we'll do the condensed version.  Because I'm all about efficiency.

1.  I got a promotion at work!  

This is spectacular for a variety of reasons - which include, but aren't limited to...

Way more money than I was making in my last department.  Holla.
No more taking calls from intellectually impaired people - or really any people, for the most part.
Social media plays a big part in my new position... and hello, paid to Tweet?  Yes, please.
Awesome, laid back people in my department.
More freedom to make my own decisions in regards to customer issues.
Responding to complaints via email - I'll take someone bitching at me through email over the phone any day.

Basically I'm just really excited about the new job.  I've only been training for 3 days now, and already love it 8424589234 Coconut Dreams more than my last position.  It's that good.  Not to mention I don't think my bank statement will be this sad ever again.

(Yeah.  I wasn't lying when I said I took way too much time off work when I was doing Reservations.) 

 So even though I loathe change, I'm embracing this particular one with gusto.

2. I didn't sleep in our bedroom for a few nights.

Luckily it wasn't because my husband was being a jackass, because he wasn't.  I wanted to to cozy up with my dude while we watched a movie, but unfortunately our couches weren't really manufactured to accommodate spooning.  Sooooo, because he's awesome, Shawn brought in our mattress and plopped it in front of the TV.  And we snuggled.  Because we are in love.  It's sounds pretty much like the dorkiest thing ever, but it was fun.  Apparently we were too lazy to move it back, so we kept it in our living room for a second night.  Toby, albeit confused, was loving having a gigantic mattress in the middle of the floor almost as much as I did.  So seriously, if you're totally bored with life, throw your mattress in another room.  If for no other reason than to confuse the hell out of people.  Spice up your life, yo.

3.  I bought my first thinger of MODGE PODGE.

I'm not sure if you remember at all how not crafty I am.  But Pinterest has me bound and more damn determined than ever to successfully complete a craft.  (Well, Pinterest and Super Saturday.  I finished a craft there, and it actually turned out significantly better than previous attempts have.  But it's not time for me to reveal that masterpiece quite yet.)  Anyways, I went to JoAnne's and perused the aisles, having not a clue in the world what I wanted to purchase.  I found the Modge Podge, and aside from just simply sounding like an awesome thing to buy, I've read about it being used on about a gazillion things on Pinterest - so I bought it, thinking there had to be something I could use it for.  And as fate would have it, there was.

Remember that absolutely horrendous Halloween party we threw last year?  Well we had a butt ton of Halloween napkins leftover, that apparently I decided we should keep (because apparently my obsessive 'keep everything that we'll never use' disorder is not just limited to grocery bags.)   We also had these two pumpkins that Shawn and I had bought because they were cute and small, and saved us a dollar on Coke.  So I had napkins, Modge Podge (#bestwordever), and a pumpkin.  You probably know where I'm going with this, and I'm 100% proud to say that I came up with the idea all. by. myself.  (Googling it afterwards, I realized I wasn't the only craft genius... But nevertheless.)  And here is my (albeit amateur) masterpiece!

Eeeeeeh?!  I also apparently decided to bedazzle the crap out of the other pumpkin (an idea which may or may not have come from that one website.)  Anyways, it's nothing that would land me my own talk show, but I'm still pretty proud of it.

4.  My husband inherited a new nickname.

And it's HotPants.  Go ahead, say it a few times.  It's even funner to say than Modge Podge.  Not that the back story is important, because HotPants is a bad ass pet name in any event.  But, I got an email from Groupon Goods advertising a good deal they had on a product called HotPants.  I looked into the website, where they made promises of losing "2 jean sizes in 2 weeks," and getting rid of cellulite, and all this other stuff that obviously sounded awesome.  Apparently how HotPants work, is by making you sweat 80% more than you normally do when you work out.  Which, if you're me, is already a disgusting, manly amount.  And even though I hate sweating with the fiery passion of 489320483902 suns, I wanted HotPants.  I immediately called my husband and launched into my argument of why I had to buy HotPants - making sure to say HotPants as much as humanly possible.  Because the best part about owning a pair of HotPants, is being able to make it a part of your daily vocabulary.  If you don't believe that I wouldn't, go ahead and count how many times I've already said HotPants in this paragraph.  Yeah.  Awesome.  Aaaanyways, I knew that something as easy as putting on a pair of thick bike shorts wasn't going to lead to permanent weight loss.  Which my dietetic guru friend confirmed, explaining the entire process of losing fat, and how the HotPants would only make me lose water weight... yadda yadda yadda.  So I begrudgingly didn't buy a pair of HotPants.  But I still needed to have an excuse to keep saying HotPants.  Thus my husband's nickname was born.  So if you're ever referring to my husband, he isn't Shawn, he's HotPants.  He keeps telling me that it won't stick.  But all good things take time.


1 comment:

  1. Hi Chelsea! Just read your Hotpants post, I would definitely recommend that you invest! I have a pair... I was sceptical at first but I contacted Hotpants to ask if it was just loss of weight through water retention etc, and I was told that you burn 0.5 calories for every gram of perspiration. Apparently your body works hard to produce sweat and that's how you burn the calories. Once that calorie is burnt... it's gone! I've taken the Hotpants 2 week challenge and already lost 3 inches around my waist. Check out their Facebook page also for reviews and tips... defo take the 2 week challenge! Good luck!