Monday, January 2, 2012

All I Want For Christmas...

For Christmas, my sweet dad painted this picture for me.


(Pardon the terrible quality of the photo.)


He and my mom gave it to me along with this book:



And I cried.

Not because I was sad - but because it was a tender reminder that my babies are up in Heaven waiting. And that even though I feel completely broken inside.  And even though my heart breaks a little more each month that I don't see the all-elusive second line.  And even though I feel like there's a gigantic, gaping void in my life.


I know that some day, whether it be a month or 7 years from now, it will by my turn.

I will get pregnant.
I will be a mom.
And I will be the happiest woman on earth.