Monday, January 27, 2014

iPhone Dump Monday

So, I was scrolling through my pictures and realized how many of them that I hadn't shared with the Internet.  Usually because I'd get sidetracked and not bother uploading them.  But mostly because a majority of them probably don't need to be shared with the Internet, because I can't imagine the internet gives a flying fart that our baby ate a box of donuts.

But just in case the Internet does care about our super fascinating life moments - because lesbehonest, you do - here's some pictures for your viewing pleasure.

If you go to Smith's at the right time, you can pick your own box of donuts for like, 3 bucks.  This particular box was gone within days.  But only because the baby ate most of it.  (Also, tell me you don't want a donut now?)

It's a good thing husband is a roofer, because ain't no way in crap I was about to climb my pregnant-or-not ass up there to hang lights.  Heights?  Me no likey.

Speaking of Christmas, I'm pretty sure I never showed the internet how adorable our little Christmas set-up was.  (You know, minus the cat's shitbox.)  I'd seriously leave Christmas decorations up all year if my husband would let me.  It makes our house way less boring, and way more fun and Jesus-y.   

So, I don't know if I've ever mentioned how much Shawn enjoys collecting coins.  He will sit and sift through his coins for hours.  He looooves it.  It can hold my attention for about 15 minutes until my A.D.D. kicks in and I start realizing how many people's germs I probably have on me after touching all those coins.

 Just in case you didn't believe just how much Shawn loves his pennies.  I sent him this picture of a jar of pennies I had found at my grandma's house and, well, you see.

So, upon Shawn's request, Santa gave him a beef stick in his stocking.  (Ew.)  Turns out beef sticks are animal whisperers, because Toby and Bob were next to Shawn within seconds of him opening it.

Guess who finally got a treadmill?  *Fist pump*  Shawn totally surprised me with it and had it sitting in our living room one morning with a big bow on it.  And even though, at this point, I can't do a whole lot on it without feeling like my tailbone is going to rip a hole through my back, I'm still pretty elated that we have it.  Now I don't have to worry about all the judgmental assholes saying, "Good for her." as I waddle through the neighborhoods and the gym.

We've been clearing out my office to make room for the baby and all his stuff - and this room doesn't have a closet - so this is where homeboy's clothes are hanging for now.  (Semi-related note: It never ceases to amaze me how much crap two people can have.  Good grief.)

This is Shawn humoring me with the horse mask I bought him for Christmas.  Everyone asks why on earth I bought him a horse mask - and clearly I did it because it's freaking hilarious.  Also, he's modeling the new rocking/recliner chair we got to go in the baby's nursery.  Squee!

So, after we finally got this effing Pack N' Play set up, we left it up for a few days for funsies (and mostly because we were too lazy to take it back down).  Let's just say that Bob is going to be pretty disappointed when he realizes it's not for him.   

Shawn went to a hockey game with a buddy, and his buddy sent me this picture and my ovaries exploded.

I laughed way too hard at this in the bathroom.  So classy. 

This is how we change lightbulbs at OUR house.

Shawn is getting pretty dang good at painting toenails.  Watch out, Asians.

So, this new rocking chair is officially my new favorite place to sit.  And whenever I come and sit here, Bob instantly comes and snuggles with my belly.  Sometimes he sleeps with his eyes open, and it's totally creepy - but adorable, nonetheless.

So, remember how "Poking" is a thing on Facebook?  Shawn and I have been having a poke war forever now.  And sometimes we'll literally just sit and poke each other immediately back and forth for an hour.  And I realize that sounds completely inappropriate, but, you know.

Speaking of inappropriate, I spit my water out laughing when the waitress brought my food out to me at IHop a few weeks ago. 

So, sometimes when I'm working and it's slow, Shawn will come in and watch a movie with me on the laptop.  This particular night HE suggested we watch Austenland while handing me a proverbial man card.  And this is proof.  (Related: Austenland?  Not a fan.)

Our cat is seriously bizarre.

Shawn had been laying on his stomach playing a game with a buddy for a while, when he stood up, two random toes were totally stark white and numb.  Just the two though.  Preeeetty random.

We finally bought Shawn a new suit and he looks totally handsome in it.  (And out of it.)

Aaaand, how about a video to finish us off?

Ever since our little nugget could supposedly hear (and even before then), Shawn has been talking to my belly.  Now that he knows baby can hear, these talks range anything from Shawn teaching him how to spell and when to use 'there', 'their', and 'they're' to just simply telling him he loves him - and it's adorable. 

One night when we were laying in bed, Shawn was like, "Oh!  Haven't talked to the baby yet today."  As he went under the covers, I secretly grabbed my phone and started recording.  It's pretty short and sweet, and you really probably can't hear what he's saying - but in between kissing my belly, he says: "I love you, sweet baby" and "I can't wait to see you, you're going to be perfect."  It's so tender, and I seriously can't wait to see them together.

Happy Monday, yo.


  1. Love your posts. And by the way, you look awesome! You still look sooo tiny. In a good way. And the pics of your cat are always hilarious.

  2. The Zany HousewifeJanuary 28, 2014 at 5:12 PM

    Your husband has finger toes like I do. It was like staring at my own damn feet.

    And now I want donuts.